Understanding and responding to parents of transgender and gender diverse young people
Introduction
This short article describes parents’ experiences of navigating the complexities of their children’s gender identity and transition. It outlines the benefits of supporting parents, and how this support affects the health and wellbeing of transgender and gender diverse young people. It also provides practice considerations for working with families of transgender or gender diverse young people.
In 2021, a survey found that 7% of young people aged 14–16 years in Australia identified as transgender or gender diverse (Power et al., 2022). This is an increase from previous surveys (e.g. 2% in a 2018 survey (Fisher et al., 2019)) and is consistent with other recent Australian surveys that suggest an increase in the number of people identifying as transgender or gender diverse (Hill et al., 2021).
Transgender refers to people whose own sense of what gender1 they are doesn’t match the sex2 they were assigned at birth (Child Family Community Australia [CFCA], 2022; Telfer et al., 2018).
Gender diverse3 is an umbrella term that refers to people who don’t conform to societal or cultural expectations or norms around gender (Telfer et al., 2018). Many societies view gender as binary, including only males and females (Telfer et al., 2018).
Cisgender refers to a person whose gender identity matches the sex that they were assigned at birth (CFCA, 2022).
Although many transgender and gender diverse young people live lives with joy, creativity, community connection and resilience (Hill et al., 2021), they may also experience challenges that prevent them from achieving good health and wellbeing. Challenges can include stigma and discrimination from other people and institutions.
This, in turn, may contribute to mental health challenges or potentially harmful behaviours, such as substance use, being used to deal with stress (Frost & Meyer, 2023; Tebbe & Budge, 2022). Compared to cisgendered young people, transgender and gender diverse young people are more likely to report high or very high levels of psychological distress, thoughts and behaviours of self-harm, and suicidal thoughts or planning (Bailey et al., 2024).
Parents and carers can be a fundamental source of support for their transgender and gender diverse child, with parental acceptance, in particular, being associated with better health and wellbeing outcomes (Brown et al., 2020). Parents’ acceptance of their transgender or gender diverse child – and their ability to provide support – can be influenced by a range of factors. These include parents’ level of awareness about gender identity, their access to information about transgender and gender diverse experiences, the quality of the parent–child relationship and peer support for parents (Morgan et al., 2022). Parents also have a large influence on a young person’s ability to access services and the type of care they receive (Riggs et al., 2020).
The evidence in this article focuses on parents who are supportive of their transgender and gender diverse child. It does not cover circumstances where there is conflict between parents and the child due to their gender identity.
The benefits of supporting parents for the health and wellbeing of transgender and gender diverse young people
Understanding and appropriately responding to the needs of parents of transgender and gender diverse young people can benefit both parents and young people.
Parents play a key protective role in reducing some of the health and wellbeing challenges commonly experienced by transgender and gender diverse young people. A review by Brown and colleagues (2020) examined the association between family relationships and the health and wellbeing of these young people. They found that those with parents who are supportive (both generally as well as specifically about gender identity), warm and caring, and who they can communicate with directly and honestly had better health and wellbeing (Brown et al., 2020).
The health improvements for transgender and gender diverse young people associated with supportive parents included (Brown et al., 2020):
- reduced anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder, disordered eating symptoms, self-harm and suicidal ideation
- greater quality of life, life satisfaction and self-esteem
- reduced risk of homelessness
- improved sexual self-efficacy and consistent condom use
- reduced risk of human immunodeficiency virus (HIV).
However, for parents to provide this support to transgender or gender diverse young people, they themselves may also need assistance and support (Riggs et al., 2020). Although many parents report that raising a child who is transgender or gender diverse can lead to personal growth and emotional connection, they may also face new challenges in adapting their parenting approach to meet their child’s changing needs (Chaplyn et al., 2024; Hynes Brothers, 2025; Morgan et al., 2022).
Many parents are unsure about how best to support their transgender or gender diverse child or where to seek advice or information (Hynes Brothers, 2025; Powell et al., 2024; Townley & Henderson, 2024).
The experiences and challenges of parents of transgender and gender diverse young people
Despite the key role of parents in promoting the health and wellbeing of transgender and gender diverse young people (Brown et al., 2020; Morgan et al., 2024), there is little research evidence about how Australian parents navigate the complexities of their child’s gender identity and transition or about what their support needs are.
This section outlines what is currently known from Australian research about parenting transgender and gender diverse young people. Due to the limited Australian evidence in this area, these findings are predominantly drawn from a single qualitative study (Powell et al., 2024). The findings from this study are consistent with research from the USA on parents of transgender and gender diverse children and young people (Canitz & Haberstroh, 2022; Field & Mattson, 2016; Hidalgo & Chen, 2019; Matsuno et al., 2022). This section is supplemented with findings from other Australian research and evidence reviews.
The Australian study conducted in-depth interviews, guided by photographs chosen by participants, with 8 parents of transgender and gender diverse young people. It found that there are several key factors that can impact the parenting experience (outlined below).
Needing to adapt to change
Parents of transgender and gender diverse young people can experience a transitional phase in their parenting as they navigate their child’s social and/or physical changes and re-establish a ‘new normal’ in their relationship with their child. When a child identifies as a different gender to what they were assigned at birth, this can mean significant changes to the child’s physical appearance, interests and social behaviours, along with a change in name and pronouns.4 These changes require significant adaptation from parents and from other people such as extended family and friends, teachers and care providers (Powell et al., 2024).
Navigating a loss of expectations
Parents of transgender and gender diverse young people may grapple with feelings of ‘losing’ their imagined future for their child, along with the need to get to know their ‘new’ child and their identity (Powell et al., 2024). In response to this loss of expectations, or changes to the child’s name, pronouns or other gendered expressions, parents may experience ‘disenfranchised’ grief. Disenfranchised grief is when a person is experiencing a loss that is not recognised or seen as legitimate by others (Doka, 1999).
This type of grief can affect parents’ wellbeing as they may feel socially isolated and misunderstood. Parents may also experience a loss or change in their hopes and expectations of their own friendships or family relationships. These feelings of loss can be further complicated by their concern for their child’s safety due to societal transphobia and possible fears of losing their child to suicide or violence (Hynes Brothers, 2025; Powell et al., 2024).
Fear of ‘failing’ to be a ‘good’ parent
Despite parents’ grief, fear and worries about their transgender or gender diverse child, parents are often reluctant to seek formal supports for themselves. Instead, many parents express the need to focus on supporting their child and their child’s wellbeing (Powell et al., 2024).
One of the reasons parents may be reluctant to seek support for themselves is the societal pressures and expectations about parenting (Novoa et al., 2022; Powell et al., 2024). Some parents (particularly mothers) can feel pressure to focus exclusively on the needs of their child. This can make it difficult for them to ask for and accept help, due to fears of being perceived as prioritising their own needs over those of their child (Novoa et al., 2022).
Parents of transgender and gender diverse young people may also feel the need to protect their child from broader societal reactions and discrimination. This can include a fear that talking with other people about challenges might result in them being seen as ‘failing’ as a ‘good’ parent (Powell et al., 2024).
Challenges navigating the health care system
Navigating health care systems can be particularly challenging for parents supporting a transgender child or young person. Transgender and gender diverse young people commonly rely on a range of services such as mental health support and medical treatment (e.g. hormone therapy, surgery and puberty supression) (Bartholomaeus et al., 2021; Chaplyn et al., 2024).
Parents have identified a range of barriers to accessing and navigating health care services, including lengthy wait times, inexperienced practitioners, complicated referral pathways and a lack of specific services (Bartholomaeus et al., 2021; Chaplyn et al., 2024; Hynes Brothers, 2025; Powell et al., 2024). The barriers to accessing gender affirming5 care can cause parents to feel further isolated and unsure of how to best support their transgender or gender diverse young person (Chaplyn et al., 2024; Powell et al., 2024).
Parental growth and enhancing connections and relationships
Despite potential challenges faced by parents of transgender or gender diverse young people, for some parents the experience can also be one of personal growth, social and emotional connection and strengthening of the child–parent relationship.
Parents have reported experiencing personal growth when they begin to question their assumptions and biases about gender. This can include becoming more informed and open-minded about gender diversity, the challenges faced by transgender and gender diverse people, and the process of medically or socially transitioning (Hynes Brothers, 2025; Morgan et al., 2024). Through being open and responsive to change, parents can begin to refocus their relationship with their child from one related to a particular gender identity (e.g. parent and daughter/son) to one of a parent and child/person (Powell et al., 2024).
Although parents rarely seek formal support for themselves, they often seek out and receive informal supports when navigating their child’s gender identity experience and transition. Parents have reported seeking and receiving support from friends, extended families, faith communities and online peer support groups (Hynes Brothers, 2025; Morgan et al., 2024; Powell et al., 2024). When parents receive these supports, it can be beneficial for their emotional and social wellbeing, expand their knowledge, and strengthen the safe supports available to them, their child and family unit (Powell et al., 2024).
The child–parent relationship can be strengthened during the period of change and uncertainty (Morgan et al., 2024; Powell et al., 2024; Riggs et al., 2020). Through taking on an advocacy role for their child, some parents gain a greater understanding of their child’s needs and emotions because they come to see the world through their child’s eyes (Morgan et al., 2024; Powell et al., 2024). Emotional connection can also be enhanced when parents witness the strengths displayed by their child, such as resilience and being caring and patient with others (Hynes Brothers, 2025; Morgan et al., 2024).
Practice considerations for supporting parents of transgender and gender diverse young people
Although more research is needed on the experiences and support needs of parents of transgender and gender diverse young people in Australia, some considerations for practice can be drawn from the current evidence base.
Figure 1 outlines some of these key practice considerations for supporting parents of transgender and gender diverse young people. Crucial for practitioners is the need to consider the whole family, including the parents, when working with transgender and gender diverse children and young people.
Practitioners can ask parents about their experiences of and emotions relating to supporting their transgender and gender diverse child and their parenting approach. If parents are experiencing challenging emotions such as grief, it may be helpful to normalise these emotions and reassure parents that this doesn’t mean they are ‘failing’ as a parent.
Practitioners can also encourage parents to seek formal and/or informal support for themselves and to practise self-care. Where appropriate, practitioners could share resources with parents that are relevant to their circumstances, geographical location and the age of their child. For example, Transcend Australia provides resources and support services to family members of transgender and gender diverse young people across Australia.
Figure 1: Practice considerations for supporting parents of transgender and gender diverse young people
Download Figure 1 as a PDF [224.42 KB].
For more information, see the related resources and further reading below.
Related resources and further reading
- Supporting trans and gender diverse children and their families
An Emerging Minds resource on working with transgender and gender diverse young people and their family. - The social and emotional wellbeing of LGBTIQA+ young people
An Australian Institute of Family Studies (AIFS) webinar on adopting an inclusive approach when working with LGBTIQA+ young people. - Trans and gender diverse support referral matrix
An Emerging Minds resource sheet containing a list of websites and organisations in each state that can provide information on supporting transgender and gender diverse people. - Informal supports to maximise health and wellbeing for LGBTIQ+ clients
An AIFS resource on the effectiveness of informal support options to improve the health and wellbeing of LGBTIQ+ people. - Supporting trans or gender diverse children and their families with gender affirmation: A guide for GPs and paediatricians
An Emerging Minds guide to having conversations with a child who is exploring their gender identity, and their family. Although this guide is targeted at general practitioners and paediatricians, other practitioners may find useful examples of questions for asking a child about their gender exploration. - Creating a welcoming and safe organisation for trans and gender diverse children and their families: A checklist for allied health services
An Emerging Minds checklist to help create a safe and welcoming environment for transgender and gender diverse children and their families. - Inclusive communication with LGBTIQ+ clients
An AIFS resource on practising inclusive communication when working with LGBTIQ+ people. - LGBTIQA+ glossary of common terms
An AIFS resource sheet that outlines common LGBTIQA+ terms and their meanings. - Australian standards of care and treatment guidelines for trans and gender diverse children and adolescents
Guidelines on health care for transgender and gender diverse young people from the Royal Children’s Hospital. - Transcend Australia
A service provider and community support organisation that provides resources and support services to family members of transgender and gender diverse young people.
References
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1 Gender refers to a person’s own sense of whether they are a man, woman, gender diverse, non-binary or other gender identity (CFCA, 2022). Gender is not restricted to a binary (i.e. male and female) (CFCA, 2022). It can also refer to the socially constructed roles, behaviours and norms placed on genders (Lindqvist et al., 2021).
2 Sex is a classification assigned at birth based on a person’s external anatomical characteristics (CFCA, 2022). Although people are usually assigned male or female, some people may be born with an intersex variation (i.e. have anatomical, chromosomal and hormonal characteristics that differ from medical understandings of males and females) (CFCA, 2022).
3 The phrase gender diverse includes people who are transgender, although not all gender diverse people are transgender (Telfer et al., 2018). Some people may have other gender identities, for example non-binary (i.e. doesn’t identify as exclusively male or female) or gender fluid (i.e. gender identity varies at different times) (CFCA, 2022; Telfer et al., 2018).
4 Pronouns are words that are used instead of a noun, such as in the place of a person’s name. Pronouns can be used to express gender identity (e.g. she/her, he/him, they/them) (CFCA, 2022).
5 Gender affirmation refers to a range of actions a person can take to live as the gender they identify with (CFCA, 2022). This may include social (e.g. changing pronouns, name, hair or clothing), medical (e.g. taking hormones, having surgery) or legal affirmation (e.g. changing the gender marker at school or on forms of ID) (CFCA, 2022).
Authors and acknowledgements
Dr Zalia Powell, Professor Cindy Davis and Emily Angeltveit are from the University of the Sunshine Coast.
Dr Melissa Willoughby works for the Australian Institute of Family Studies in Child Family Community Australia.
The authors would like to acknowledge and thank Marie-Louise Willis, a parent of a gender diverse young person, for providing valuable advice and feedback on this resource.
22 July 2025