Young people and relationships: Support and information
Respectful relationships
Respectful relationships are built on respect, good communication and equal rights and opportunities. You should never be made to feel bad or lesser than anyone else.
Intimate partner violence
If your partner repeatedly makes you feel unsafe, this could be a sign of an unhealthy relationship. Intimate Partner Violence isn’t just physical or verbal abuse – it can also happen when one person repeatedly tries to control their partner.
Understanding signs of a healthy or unhealthy relationship
• You are treated equally in your relationship.
• You have the freedom to see your friends and family and make decisions about your body, work and home.
• You have control over how you spend your money and time, and the cultural or religious practices you follow.
• You feel safe when you have disagreements with your partner and safe to say no.
• You can communicate your boundaries and know they will be respected.
• Your partner tries to control or pressure you. This could include making decisions about who you see or communicate with, where you go, how you spend your money, and your lifestyle choices.
• Your partner deliberately hurts you or threatens to hurt you.
Examples of what an unhealthy relationship might look or feel like:
Your partner:
• deliberately criticises you to embarrass or belittle you in front of others
• intentionally makes you question your own memory and mental health by withholding information and lying
• yells at you, calls you hurtful names or unfairly blames you
• intimidates you by pressuring you to do things, or stop doing things, such as engaging in sexual activities.
Your partner:
• constantly texts or calls you when you’re not together and gets angry if you don’t respond fast enough
• uses digital technology to manipulate, pressure, control or track you
• asks you to send them intimate pictures, even though you don’t want to.
Your partner:
• refuses to let you work or study, so you become financially dependent on them
• limits your access to money, or controls how you spend your money, for example, by stopping you from having a separate bank account.
Your partner:
• makes you feel scared of them by physically hurting, or threatening to hurt, you, themselves, your family or your pets
• makes you do sexual things that you’re not comfortable with or don’t want to do
• stops you from using birth control or forces or pressures you to have a baby when you don't want to.
Getting support
If you would like to talk to someone about your own situation, consider reaching out to a trusted friend or family member, or seeking confidential support from a counselling service.
Where to access support
- Call 1800 737 732 (available 24/7)
- Text 0458 737 732
- Or use the online chat on the 1800 RESPECT website.
- Call 1800 385 578 (available 24/7)
- Or use the online chat at Full Stop Australia website.
- Call 1300 657 380 (Monday to Sunday 9 am to 5 pm AEST/AEDT)
- Or email [email protected]
- Call 1300 766 491 (available 24/7)
- Or use the online chat on the No to Violence website.
Call 13 92 76 (available 24/7) or visit the 13YARN website.
- Call 1800 650 890
- Or use the online chat on the Headspace website.
Download the Daisy app from the 1800 RESPECT website.
Further resources
If you are interested in more information about healthy relationships, intimate partner violence and coercive control, you may wish to explore the resources below.
To read more about signs of healthy and unhealthy relationships, visit the 1800 RESPECT website.
For information about different types of domestic and family violence, visit the Full Stop Australia website.
For educational videos and fact sheets about coercive control, visit the Attorney-General's Department website.
For more information about abuse that happens online, or uses digital technology, visit the eSafety Commissioner website.
General practitioners (GPs)
Your GP can talk to you about your specific situation and may refer you to other services that can further support you. If you do not have a regular GP, and would like help finding a doctor that is accessibly located and priced for you, please visit the Healthdirect website.
In an emergency, call 000.
We would like to acknowledge the contribution of victim survivors from The University of Melbourne, Safer Families Centre WEAVERs lived expertise group.
Your partner:
• tells you who you can and can’t communicate with or cuts you off from social support, like friends and family
• makes rules about where you can go and what clothes you can wear
• stops you from participating in religious, spiritual or cultural practices or events.